i hate being sick. It’s just a crummy feeling to know that you don’t have the energy to do the stuff you want/need to do. Broken.
i was talking to my sister this afternoon, and she was telling me how she has been sick as well, and when she was brave enough to ask for some help, she got treated like a leper. So, you’re already feeling pathetic, and now someone feels it’s necessary to tell you that you ARE pathetic. Broken.
i think physical sickness is a great reminder of how weak we really are. We can get pretty sure of ourselves when we are normally able to do all the things we think we should be able to do. Then we get a little head cold and all of a sudden we can’t think clearly and it feels like our arms and legs weigh a ton each. Broken.
The truth is that we’re not supposed to get too comfortable here. This life is full of broken. We spend a lot of energy acting like we’re fine and trying to convince everyone that nothing is wrong, as if there’s nothing wrong with them either. It’s exhausting, isn’t it? You might even be sitting there thinking, “i feel alright. i don’t think there’s anything wrong.” That’s a different kind of broken.
Our frailty has become a white noise of sorts. Have you ever been sitting around doing something, lost in thought or busyness, and then you hear it… silence. You hadn’t even noticed the noise around you until it was gone. It happens to me when i’m on the computer and then the playlist that i was listening to ends. That’s when you hear the silence. Our brokenness is a lot like that. All of the “normal” keeps us from noticing it until something jostles us into the reality that we need help.
Sometimes it’s sickness. Sometimes it is an emergency. Sometimes it’s just a lot of things that add up to being short with your spouse. All of the sudden, you feel it. You can sense it as easily as if someone had just stepped on your toe. You are broken. You can’t do this on your own.
God has given us the gift of each other, and He expects us to participate in this thing called community, but He’s also given us everything we need for life and Godliness. All of it is a gift, though, and when we start thinking we can do it on our own… “Don’t worry, Jesus, i’ve got this one.” …we soon find that we are even weaker than we thought. Don’t be discouraged. This is loving reproof. You aren’t supposed to do this alone. Don’t try. You are broken. Join the club. i’ll make cookies.